Friday, May 22, 2009

Yes we can do

Five top ideas have emerged from the entrepreneurial
summit in Auckland attended by 100 of the country’s
leading entrepreneurs. These are the ideas that will
kickstart the economy, tap this country’s untapped
potential and boost New Zealand into the top half of the
OECD, no worries. Are you ready?

Give it a crack, Jack. A marketing and educational
campaign will be launched with this snappy slogan, which
is aimed at tapping the average bloke’s vast resources of
untapped potential, and stuff. Sponsored by Eezee-Lift
Garage Doors and Sink-Back Garden Hammocks.

Give it a prod, Rod. A marketing campaign targeted at
Kiwis' natural instinct for getting the job done with a bit of
tinkering. International research shows that countries with
a strong tinkering tradition are more likely to get into the
top half of the OECD.

Give it a rev, Trev. This $2b promotional campaign will
be targeted at Kiwis' innate No 8 wire mentality, the can-do
attitude that got Hillary to the top of Everest and Marc Ellis
to the middle of the juice market.

Give it a whirl, Shirl. One for the girls. They too have
their part to play! Whether it’s providing token
representation on boards or being patronised at gender-
appropriate moments, New Zealand's women are right
there when the rubber meets the road, or something.

Give it a heave, Steve. A hot-button campaign aimed at
making gumboot-throwing an international sport with
professional league teams, day-night games and lashings of
entrepreneurial investment. This one will really put New
Zealand on the map! All games to be played in Pakistan.


Deborah said...


Alma said...

That's lovely dear. I didn't quite hear what the nice young man said after (batteries low again I'm afraid), but don't you think his idea of a "no bone zone" has at least a little merit?
A rather vulgar epithet I know, but I take it he is proposing a total ban on viagra and related products, which surely could only do good?
I blame this muck for most of what I call the "mental masturbation" behaviour we see on show in business and politics today (including this meeting we're talking about).
If only all these middle-aged boys would stop trying to be "important" and just get fat, go back to their lodges and their bowls and leave us in peace, what a lovely country we'd be again.

Anonymous said...

After the Budget

Where was the thrill, Bill?

Election - Bring it on, John!

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